Consumer Tip of the Day

Don't buy a Moon Pie from a liquor store.

I stopped at the classic liquor store on the corner today. I was looking for a bottle of water and found parking right in front. In Berkeley, you take whatever space you can find. When you see a space, you become euphoric, even a little cocky about your good fortune.

On my way to the cold drinks, I spotted a chocolate Moon Pie. I hadn't eaten one since December 12 and thought now's the time.

Once back in the car, I removed the wrapper and bit into it hoping for the best; at the same time suppressing my disappointment at the discoloration of the surface chocolate layer. My taste buds registered no reaction to this Moon Pie. It was thoroughly dessicated. Fossilized. Probably it had been sitting on the shelf since Ronald Reagan's second term just waiting for a sucker like me to come along and pay full retail.

Thinking about it later, it occurred to me that I should have known better. Who goes into a liquor store to buy a Moon Pie? What alcoholic beverage does a Moon Pie go with? Maybe the strawberry and banana Moon Pies go with daiquiries but even that's a stretch.

Buying Moon Pies at a liquor store is like buying carrots at a tire shop.

Don't get burned. Caveat emptor.