Passport Theft in Argentina

I was supposed to leave Buenos Aires but something happened that left me stuck to it like fly paper. The guides tell us that the thieves of Buenos Aires are among the best in the world. Travelers are exhorted to exercise caution. I, a sophisticated traveler, didn't worry too much about that advice since only people who fail to pay attention will get their things ripped off and it never had happened to me.

Between 14:45:30 and 14:45:45 ART, my backpack was stolen at the corner of Av. Corrientes and Rodriguez Peña. The dastardly deed happened because I turned my attention away for a tiny moment to watch a presidential candidate telling a gaggle of reporters about his plan to develop alternative energy sources and eliminate hunger. All of his handouts were green. He had an honest face.

Inside the backpack were round trip airline tickets to Ushuaia, a digital camera, glasses, two travel guides and, of course, my passport. I made an immediate report to the police explaining how that the backpack disappeared while I was sitting at a table outside a cafe. Told the cop that I didn´t think the candidate was guilty. He was way to progressive to be a thief. The cop said we shouldn't jump to conclusions. At the end of the interview, he wrote up a Certificado de Denuncia detailing what happened and what was taken. After I proofed it for accuracy and noticed that he didn't mention the loss of my passport, he revised it and delivered it to me, signed, sealed and suitable for framing. I had to take it to the US consulate for a replacement passport. That´s happening now.

For a while, I was upset about the loss but found a silver lining in the disaster. Now I´ll have less stuff to drag around.

At the consulate, they told me that Bush´s daughter had her purse snatched a while back from a restaurant table. And she had secret service protection. Seems it's true that the thieves in this town are the best.

To avoid snafus over the passport reissuance, I had gone online to do my due diligence before going to the consulate. The website said I might be asked questions about things citizens are expected to know. Reading this, I worried that I could get quizzed about baseball. That was sure to do me in. This is everything I know about baseball:

1. The 880 is a bitch to drive when the A´s are playing at the Coliseum.
2. Baseball is associated with beer, hotdogs and steroids.
3. Babe Ruth, Hank Aaron and Mickey Mantle were these baseball dudes who did some really cool shit.
4. Barry Bonds broke the record for the most career home runs. Why this is a big deal, I don't know. Seems you´d want to know more like how long was his career relative to the other guy whose record he beat. Did he face more challenging playing conditions? Was Bonds using steroids? How about the other guy? Should this matter?

I hoped I wouldn't be asked baseball questions.

With the new passport in hand, the schedule is to head down to Tierra del Fuego. Expect to be there for 8 days. The land of fire, penguins and glaciers.